Release Date Autumn 2025
Hold Shift to Run is my story of surviving childhood trauma, navigating the complexities of toxic family dynamics as a child, becoming aware of my condition as an adult and making the steps to grow.
From the struggles of a child trying to make sense of an unsafe home environment, to the challenges that followed me into adulthood that affected work, friendships and romantic relationships, this book explores the lasting impact of abuse, neglect and the painful journey to healing.
This is my story of finding the courage to heal and take responsibility for the wounds inflicted my caregivers. By learning to communicate my experience, triggers and feelings, I can allow other people in and feel less alone with my struggles.
I share my experiences in this book with a great level of authenticity, hoping to connect with others who may have faced similar challenges and traumas and capture the experiences, the impact, how this has affected me in life and how I learned to overcome or cope with the effects.
I was born as Will Warren in 1980 in a city called Basildon. My early childhood seemed ideal on the surface with frequent visits to theme parks, enjoying regular vacations to places like Disney World, New York, Austria and other locations which I can vaguely recollect.
I can imagine for the people that surrounded us, we must have looked wealthy where we lived in a small oasis of new, custom designed houses which felt like an island compared to our surroundings.
When I became ten years old, my father suddenly left me for another family and abandoned me with an emotionally controlling mother who I developed a co-dependent relationship with until my early twenties.
My grandad stepped in to be my part time father and over the years, I felt a loyalty to him and my mother and so changed my name to Will Falkowski so that I can carry a name to be proud of.
Looking back over my teenage years, I realised that i'd been coerced in to choosing loyalty between my mum and dad, not told the truth about my fathers disappearance and been made to believe he didn't love my sister and I.
These early and traumatic experiences were going to shape the rest of my life in ways I could never have imagined as a child. I struggled in school, had an inability to concentrate in class, lived through multiple school suspensions which ultimately led to no qualifications.
Through my younger years, after the divorce of my parents, I suffered from anxiety disorders, PTSD, depersonalisation and various stages of depression and anxiety.
Sadly, back then, going to a psychologist or therapist had not been common practice so I was left to suffer with multiple types of mental illness alone.
Hold Shift to Run is not a negative story of all the bad stuff that happened, it's my personal account of how I decided one day to make something of myself and started a very colourful journey to where I am today.
I had an intense desire to better myself, leave my mother and not end up dead or in jail. I set off on a path of self-education, growth, hustling myself into my career with a focus on righting the wrongs my caregivers had done to me.
Throughout my adult life, i've been on a journey of growth and self development which at times, became unimaginably painful. Challenging negative self beliefs, questioning my own perception of reality and ultimately wanting to feel well, I've started writing this book which is full of great tips, tools, strategies and ways to also better yourself if you've had a similar experience.
I'm also hoping that by writing this book, I can discover some new truths about my past and understand myself better while opening a safe place for communication around childhood trauma and the difficulties that it causes in adult life.
This book is my deeply personal and vulnerable account of how I navigated childhood trauma, understood my condition and the impact abusive parents had on me and ultimately, how I finally showed up to the party and became the authentic version of myself.
I share my experiences in this book with a great level of vulnerability and honesty, hoping to connect with others who may have faced similar challenges and traumas.
The purpose of Hold Shift to Run is not to just tell my story, but to offer the tools and insights I gained along the way, hoping readers can recognise their negative patterns in my story or at least, start to question the thoughts that are leading them to feel unhappy.
Does what you feel now really belong in the present? is there a better way to communicate this with the people who care about you, co workers, loved ones?
I believe that by sharing my story, I can create a space for connection and vulnerability, reminding others, and myself, that we are not alone and it's not our fault.
It is however our responsibility to take action and tend to our wounds, even when the wounds that were inflicted on us were because of the condition of others.
Reach out and ask me anything you like about my journey, stay up to date with updates or ask for some samples if you would like to get involved in the process.